Jay and Andreas Bell (Andreas is the handsome one)
The evening began with a cocktail reception—an hour of free drinks and mingling that I wish had gone on longer. Not just because of the booze, but because this part of the Lammys was most conductive to conversation. The actual awards ceremony required respectful silence, and the music pumping at the after party made comprehension impossible. Only the cocktail reception provided the right environment for getting chatty. Picture a room filled with men and women dressed to the nines, half of whom (myself included) wore a “Holy crap! Who are all these people?” expression. The other half conversed comfortably, as if they spent all their time at such events. The situation would have been intimidating if not for the extremely supportive genre I work in. Case in point, fellow finalist Eden Winters soon tracked me down.
From left to right: Barry Brennessel, Eden Winters, Jim Provenzano, and Jay Bell
All too soon it was time for the awards ceremony. Even as we headed toward the auditorium, I was having misgivings about a winner being announced. Don’t get me wrong, I wanted to win, but I also wanted the same for the other finalists. Every nominated author had friends, family or fans somewhere cheering them on, wanting the best for them. And each of my fellow finalists hoped this was the moment their hard work would be recognized by the most illustrious literary award for queer fiction. I felt nervous in equal parts about losing or winning, since neither option sounded ideal. To make matters worse, we weren’t allowed to bring our drinks to our seats. Maybe this was for legal reasons, or perhaps they wanted to prevent us from drinking ourselves into comas. Nerves and alcohol aren’t the best combination, although I bet I wasn’t the only one willing to risk it.
Authors mourn their lost drinks while finding a seat. Next time I'm bringing a flask to pass around.
Which brings me to the result of my own book. Something Like Summer didn’t take the prize. I kept telling Andreas beforehand that I would be okay no matter the result. When the winner was announced, I found that to be true. The title that did win, Jim Provenzano’s Every Time I Think of You, is an easy book to concede to. Not only is it beautifully written and well executed, but like me, Jim was one of the few self-published finalists this year. I know first-hand just how much work goes into being an indie author and how much more doubt there can be without a publisher backing you up. I would have been happy to see any of my fellow finalists win, but it felt like a victory for indie authors that a self-published book won a Lambda award this year. After the result was announced, poor Andreas held his breath for nearly half an hour waiting for me to get mopey, but after a bunch of reassuring smiles and hand squeezes (and a few kisses) he realized that things really were all right.
Lady Bunny (the wig!) played DJ while these other three tore the dance floor to pieces.
If I could answer that initial question now, I would tell the camera man that the Lambda Literary Awards aren’t just about selecting the best books of the year. The Lammys are a celebration of who we are and who we love. It’s a tribute to those before us who hoisted the light of hope and inspiration. It’s also a message to those just beginning their journey, showing them that we have many reasons to come together and rejoice. And for an author, the Lambda Awards are a damn fine excuse to temporarily leave the lonely work days behind and make new friends. Someday I still hope to snag one of those pretty trophies, but even if I never do, getting to meet such fine people was prize enough for me.
Jay Bell is the author of Something Like Summer and Kamikaze Boys, books that are heavy on heart and have a touch of heat. He’s also written a couple of fantasy novels that are seriously in need of more love from you guys. For real! They’re needy!
*Super cool bonus!* Andreas has put together a PDF of photos and sketches he made during our trip to New York, including more shots of the Lammys. Check it out here. It’s free! Hitting the right arrow key should let you toggle through the pages.
Jay
What a great post and tribute to the Lammys. You are such a wonderful storyteller and this post, which could have gone either way (sobs or funk) didn’t, and instead gave readers a look at the fun behind the scenes at the Lambdas from the perspective of an insider albeit a new one.
It’s great that an indie writer won and I think that’s a salute to the growth of the genre. I’ll definitely check out Andreas’s photos and the winning book.
Thank you once again for offering to do this.
Thanks, Wave! I love posting here. It’s my home away from home!
I’m really happy that you regard the site as your home away from home Jay.
Tell Andreas that he’s hot enough to be one of the Friday Guys but he needs to shed a few (maybe a lot) of his clothes. 
Thank you for this post and congrats: to be finalist it´s itself being a winner & Thank you Andreas!!
But… but… The link doesn´t work??
Oh, man! I’m glad you pointed out the broken link. It’s now fixed and working.
Thank you so much for sharing
It sounds like a wonderful time for everyone, and a real celebration of GLBTQ literature, which is what’s important
Congratulations on finaling, Jay. That’s an awesome accomplishment on its own, even without taking home the trophy!
Thanks, Ally! I agree and tried to keep in mind how nice it is to be a finalist. I’ve submitted books to the Lammys previously that didn’t make it that far, so this felt like a nice achievement on its own.
It was wonderful meeting you and Andreas, Jay.
And thanks for sharing the photos and drawings. I love your hubby’s art work. You two are such a cute couple! I, too, was surprised at the spirit of comeraderie at the awards. 
What an amazing experience, and I’m thrilled to have met ya’ll, Jim (congrats on the win, Jim!), Barry and his husband, Dave, Marshall Thornton, and Greg Hogben. Whoot! I danced with Milan (and everybody else!) Who knew my pal P.D. Singer was such an accomplished dancer? What an after party! 
Thanks for a nice summation, Jay. Really an amazing night that flew by too quickly.
I’ve got all my co-nominees’ books on order; looking forward to reading them! Honored to be a newbie in this thriving genre!
Thank you so much for this post Jay, I feel that I had been to the awards now
. Congratulations to all the finalists and the winner of course.
Hey Jay loved the pics. Those are the coolest brown high tops ever. Glad you and Andreas had some fun. Thank him for the PDF.
Your fan, Lucas
PS: How many award winners books are being made into a movie like your book? You’re always a winner.
Really enjoyed the post and the pics are fab. Thank you Jay.
Jay, You are such a self-effacing, humble man!! I love when you write for us!! How lovely to hear about your experience and I can see you making many many return trips to that venue!!
What a nice summary of the evening and big congratulations to everyone who made it there (and it’s cool to see pictures to go with familiar names.) I do wish I’d seen that dance though…
Frequent visitor, first time commenter here.
I just wanted to say how much I enjoyed Jay’s post, and how honored I was to meet Jay, Eden, and Jim. What a great group of people.
It was truly a memorable evening.
Jay, I’ve read your book and I’m sorry you didn’t win. I loved Andreas’ photos and the graphics were awesome!!