Let me begin by saying what an incredible job you do! Keeping track of whose naughty and nice…micromanaging a gaggle of elves…all that peak holiday travel time, and all while totally rocking a red felt suit? Color me impressed, Big Daddy. I have no doubt you make the heart of many a cub out there pitter-patter in anticipation…all of them waiting patiently, well-hung, by the chimney with care, praying and hoping you soon will be there. You sexy beast…woof! ; )
Howdy Guys & Gals!
I’m here today to give you an update on all the fun, fun, fun, we have planned for ABQ this coming October. So don’t let your daddy take your T-Bird away, damn it…you just might need it. Hell, bring your daddy along if you have to…I’ll do my best to keep him entertained.
After the amazing experience we had in New Orleans and the overall success of that inaugural event, the other organizers and I had only one goal in mind with regard to our Sophomore year. It had to be Bigger, Badder, & Totally Uncut! (Okay so that’s three goals, but we all know I’m greedy & were I to be perfectly honest we’re happy to take you, circumcised or not – though I hear hoodies are in right now.)
Greetings one and all! Despite what Wave has likely told you, I’m thrilled to be back on the site spewing my very own special words of wisdom. Sigh…I do love to spew. While grappling with what topic I wanted to discuss with you guys today, I considered many things. Some of them even more serious in nature, like about writing and stuff. But after much soul searching and careful consideration, I came to the realization there were already plenty of great writers who frequent the hallowed halls of Jessewave who already do that sort of thing for you and way better than I ever could. I therefore decided to stick with what I know…tacky dick jokes and bawdy humor… at my own expense if necessary. With that in mind, I went to something old that’s kinda new again, at least for me.
When preparing to write this post I couldn’t for the life of me, decide whether or not I had anything to actually say. That’s tough for a guy like me to admit – you know, being all loud-mouthed and stuff. I pride myself on being able to provide a constant stream of information, albeit mostly of the completely useless variety, but still. I have my pride! My short-comings notwithstanding, I wasn’t able to find a topic that I could really get behind. Nothing I could wrap my insanity around and really run with – pushing it to the next level by creating a thousand word or so blog post to showcase my inner brilliance…or insanity as the case may be…depending on each of your own individual opinions about the man-myth behind the homo that is me.
It was quite the conundrum as I had all sorts of smaller issues on my mind. Stuff which had been bugging me for months and years all equally important on the list of priorities inside my big-ole brain, but weren’t actually blog-post worthy in either scope or magnitude. I was left with feelings of unworthiness and ineptitude. It like, sucked and stuff. It was in that moment of despair that my inner cheerleader sprang into Bring It On style action, saying, “Don’t cry little homo! Instead of writing about one topic, you should share your insights about all of them!”
Hello one and all!
Considering I’m once again back at the helm is further proof that the rumors aren’t true! Wave was not rushed the nearest psych-ward after my last post in February. I knew I was being railroaded when the CDC released their so called findings: that a daily dose of Ethan Day could be hazardous to your health! As if!! I’m just like candy, people! A few licks have never killed anyone.
And no, my little monkeys, while I may make an illicit confession or two throughout this post, it has nothing to do with the annual party down in New Orleans of the same name. However, the title is evocative of another annual rite-of-passage…one of mine at least. I’m speaking about the particular time of year in which we now find ourselves. Why, you may be asking? The reason is actually pretty simple. We’re here because this queer tends to see a boost in that special sorta yearning, you know, an elevation in my desire for a little decadence in my southern regions. Continue reading
……… lovingly brought to you by Ethan Day
Happy Valentine’s Day weekend to one and all! And baby, it’s cold outside!! Not at all the kinda weather that has me wanting to make declarations of love OR do the nasty. The only thing I want to wrap my legs around at the moment is a space heater – which could be shocking in more ways than one. At the very least, I’d have a heck of a time explaining where those grill marks on my inner thighs came from.
And even the snow, which I used to love so much, has now turned on us. The stupid white crap is everywhere! I should’ve been a little more specific in my letter to Santa…when asking him to send nine inches my way. Putting the weather aside, since that isn’t what I’m here to chat with you about today – in my first official post as the newest staffer on The Jessewave Gay-zette.
*Imagines Wave popping fistfuls of antacids while muttering pleas of mercy*
No sir. This day has been reserved for the one topic in which we’re all either addicted to writing and or reading about.